New podcast episode has just been released! You can listen to Cerberus, the Many-Headed Enigma on Spotify, or a range of other podcast apps. As always, for more accessibility, please find the episode transcript below (although, do keep in mind that this episode is an audio production, complete with sound effects). 

S03E03: Cerberus, the Many-Headed Enigma - TRANSCRIPT

[Hospital bed heart monitor beeping sound.]

[Door opens. Chatter heard. Door closes. Chatter disappears.]

[Footsteps sound as the person crosses the room. Sets down their things. Sighs as they get into a chair.]

Hey. It’s me. I’m sorry it took so long for me to come visit you. I’ve had… well, I had exams, and then my nephew got himself into trouble again, so of course Aunt Helen had to come to the rescue. He should really just go home already. His father’s just being stubborn… Anyway, that’s the crazy week I’ve had.

It’s been about eight days, right? Yeah… it really has been a while. Sorry about that. I hope you haven’t been too bored in here. The nurses tell me that you should be waking up any day now. I asked them to turn on the TV for you every now and then. Keep you company when I’m not here.

God, that thing must drive you crazy! Let me turn it off for you. Well - not turn it off, just mute it. [Beeping stops] There, that's much better.

[Silence, followed by the unzipping of a bag and the sound of a book being pulled out.]

I didn’t get a chance to go to the library, what with everything that’s been happening. So, I brought this magazine instead. Not really your kind of thing, I know. But I bookmarked a couple of articles in here that I thought you’d enjoy.

This first one’s called “Cerberus: The Many-Headed Enigma”. You love all those mystery conspiracy shows, so I think this one might be right up your alley, actually. I heard the author got fired for writing this, and the magazine editor also got fired for letting it get published, which is pretty weird. Kind of overkill, in my opinion… But let’s see what she has to say.

[Clearing of throat.]

“Cerberus: The Many-Headed Enigma” by Antonia Morres.

In the quiet forest town of Supul – Supple? Not sure how that’s supposed to be read... a group of individuals sighted what could only be described as a monster. A dog-like creature, they said, with four heads, sharp teeth in each mouth, and a body the size of a cow. This beast, now referred to by the name of Cerberus – the three-headed hound which guarded the gates of the underworld in Greek mythology – has since become a topic of heated controversy.

At the heart of the controversy is, as is the case with all cryptozoological creatures, the debate on its existence. Is the Cerberus monster real, or is it simply a hoax conjured up for media attention? Evidence of the beast exists in various forms: videos, photographs, witness statements, police reports, and even the corpses of farm animals ravaged by what seems to be a pack of rabid dogs – or a many-headed hound.

But many are reluctant to believe the proof that has been presented. Most community members write off this Cerberus monster as nothing more than legend – along the lines of Bigfoot or the chupacabra. As author Hyba Ouazzani says in her upcoming horror writing workshop, however, ‘monsters are often representations of the vices, taboos, and situations we want to keep our communities away from.’ If the Cerberus monster truly is nothing more than a piece of fiction, what does it represent, and why has it emerged into the public conscience now?

One way to find out is by looking at the theories that believers share about the origins of this creature. For example, blogger Nat Urelle claims that the monster might be an unfortunate but terrifying case of natural mutation gone wrong – a reminder that Mother Nature should be given the attention, respect, and care it deserves. UFO-ologist Lydia Marx claims this might be a case of genetic modification – or alien intervention – gone wrong, which could easily be interpreted as a warning to scientists that playing God could ruin us all. Political analyst Henri Muller is not a believer – in fact, he decries claims of the Cerebrus monsters as nothing more than silly hoax – but he has shared on his podcast that the many-headed monster could be a subconscious representation of a fractured political system and its perils. 

I feel like he's reaching a bit, but ok.

Of course, all of this is assuming the Cerberus monster is nothing more than fiction.

Let us assume for a moment, however, that the Cerberus monster is not fiction. That this fearsome creature is, indeed, very real. It stands to reason that the most logical and rational theories of this beast’s origin are possibly the most likely. A natural mutation, experimentation gone wrong – in this author’s opinion, there’s nothing else that could potentially have caused such a horrifying three-headed hound.

However, there is another interesting point which has yet to be investigated by most interested parties. While it seems to be a core element in the mystery of the Cerberus monster, it is one that has become increasingly contested. The number of heads. The first accounts of this beast show a three-headed monster. This, of course, is why it received the name Cerberus. But accounts of encounters – some of which include photographic or video evidence – present a monster with four heads. How is this possible?

Many are quick to disclaim these latter accounts as nothing more than viral attention-grabbing hoaxes capitalizing on the popularity of this monster. However, analysts have shown that some of the photographs showing a four-headed Cerberus monster have not been tampered with. This has led some to further claim that these photographs, while not doctored, are photographs of fake models of animals. World-famous vlogger Matteo Rossi - hey, I've watched his videos! - has shown in a step-by-step video that it isn’t difficult to create a 3D statue of such a creature by using 3D printing techniques and painting the resulting sculpture. However, this does not account for videos of the Cerberus monster, which feature it moving and making sounds – a few of which have also been proven to be un-doctored.

This begs the question: if the Cerberus monster is real, could we be dealing with more than one of them? Where did they come from?

This, at least, is a question with some kind of answer. The un-doctored and “real” photographs or videos of the Cerberus monster are all taken in a particular region of the country. Most photographic or video evidence from other countries or regions have been revealed to be hoaxes, or haven’t been verified at all. This helps up narrow it down to the town of Supul, where it all began. And, when investigating the town itself, peculiar coincidences appeared.

The most striking is the existence of a nearby--

[DOOR OPENS]

Nurse: Oh – I’m sorry to disturb you. It’s time for her sponge bath.

Person: No – that’s alright. I can come back again another time.  Let me get out of your hair. [Whispering/talking close to listener/patient] I’ll be back soon, okay? You just make sure you wake up soon. We’re all rooting for you.

[Steps away] Have a good day.

Nurse: Thank you, darling. You, too.

[DOOR CLOSES]

[tub of water, sponge sounds]

What’s this? I think your friend forgot her magazine. ...Hm. This is actually really interesting. You don’t mind if I borrow it for a little while, do you?

[Silence.]

I’ll take that as a no. I’ll have it back here as soon as I’m done with it! Now, let’s get to this sponge bath before the water gets cold. [Sounds of water, sponge, fading out…]